Tag Archives: joan collins

Empire of the Ants

Empire of the Ants became a ‘must see’ movie for me after a recent discussion involving the movie Thankskilling.  Wait, you’ve never seen Thankskilling? Put this blog post down and go watch it!

Anyways…during the discussion it was brought to my attention that Netflix recommended this movie in association with Thankskilling.  THEN I was told hold it had Joan Collins and William Shatner in it.  It doesn’t really have Shatner in it, but whatever.  It was enough of a draw to make me sit down on Saturday with a plate of tater tots and watch the big ants that destroyed the world.  Not really the world, just a small part of Florida, but again, whatever.  Plus it is a HG Wells tale, so you really can’t go wrong.

But let’s back up.  It takes place in Florida!  I was swelling with home state pride when I saw that it was shot in Florida.  Right by Lake Okeechobee! I thought all that flat boring land looked familiar.

Back to the movie.  The real star of the movie? Robert Lansing! Joan Collins is awesome, and really showcased that she had that ‘I’m a bitch’ routine nailed, but Robert Lansing as the crotchety old boat captain that ends up saving the day? Brilliant.  And who is that in the background being the dick of the movie?  None other than Sgt. Joseph Getraer from CHiPs, Robert Pine!  Man, he’s a pussy in this movie, and a huge dick.

The only thing about this movie that didn’t make me hit the Awesome button, was the soundtrack.  They got a little lazy and stole the soundtrack from Jaws.  Yes, the DUM DUM from Jaws is terrifying, but you really couldn’t think of a better suspense theme?  Points retracted for that, Empire of the Ants. 

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